Self Portrait

Ive just finished my first year of my Foundation Degree in Professional Photography, and now the first year if over I'm kind of looking back and what I've done and where I am. I've learnt so much and done what I think is well with an average of 65% pass (40% is minimum pass), that my confidence in what I do has grown.

Now that we've got the summer break, it's knowing what to do so that I can keep the rhythm going. When I was sat with my tutor, I was asked what did I think I would do over the summer and it came to mind that maybe I would do a series of images that were self portraits or selfies which seems to be the in word.

I took a week to relax and do nothing, but it soon felt that I should be doing something, so I began the journey.

Over the last year, I've built my gear up and even invested in a new camera as I had kind of out used the features of the old camera and I know the benefit of having a full-frame camera. My studio equipment was another area thats been built up over the past few months, and I know that in my second year we will be doing a lot of studio work, so its worth getting some practice in over the summer to find new ways of working with equipment and lighting in particular.

So after setting up the studio and getting myself in front of the lens, I drew a blank as to what was going to be a self portrait, is there a formula to it or do I just try and pose and click the shutter and see what happens? As I looked at the first couple of image the posing side of things just wasn't working, I now understand what its like for those that I photograph and direct in what pose I wanted them to do, it seems like there is a learning side to being a model and being able to work with a photographer. I have always looked at the idea that when working in the studio or on location, that I would be looking for that natural look, something thats un staged, to do this you have to communicate with your sitter, and on a level of just having a chat while at the same time asking them to move their head of arm etc to what you're looking for in the shot. Getting a smile or laugh, you have to find things that will make them do this, either in a joke or something that you have in common. It doesn't matter if you know the person or not, you need that communication to be able to come up with that shot that they've hired you for.

But when it's just you and know one else, your on a whole different level of doing portrait images, you don't have that direction. After half the day gone by I started to just face the camera with the remote shutter in one hand and looking at things around the room and then taking the shot. Now I was getting images that reflected me and how I look to others, how do I know that, well because I was just being relaxed and focusing on something other than the lens. I would move myself to different directions and adjust how sit in my chair, either sitting forward with my chin in my hand, to looking up and closing my eyes as a kind of sigh of relief. 

I looked at the images initially and then left them alone for a few days before going back to them.

Know at the stage, I wanted to work out a way of post editing them images. I'm a great fan of the photographer, Lee Jeffries and his dark and powerful looking images that he's done in the passed of the homeless, they have such character and definition to his images that I wanted to try and edit my images in a technique that was similar to how he produces his images. I don't know how he does his work apart from the small piece of info that he uses a dodge and burn technique, there are plenty of ways to work with an image to come with something similar. As I started on the first one, it just wasn't happening in Photoshop, so I did a slight HDR single image, and this began to come together as I then reworked the image in Photoshop. 

The images might look I've been working in a coal mine or something, but the images highlight the blemishes in my skin because of my age and the wrinkles that are there. The idea of a self portrait is not to hide from what I actually look like to others, but to except those blemishes and flaws that I have. Yes, they are over exaggerated, but this is about me being happy in my own skin as it's the only one that I have!

I'm 51 tomorrow, but someone close that had no idea of my age was asked how old did they think I was, and they replied mid forties! well I know that I don't look my age as many have made the same comment, I'm just lucky with the look that I have to seem I younger than I am. But imagine if I had retouched the image to get ride of the blemishes and wrinkles, I could have taken off another 10 years and look like I was in my thirties, but this would not be me or who I am and would be going against the idea of a series of images that are about me in the now and not then.

I've done not just colour but also black and white as I personally like black and white and its just my preference, and will when they are all complete post on my website in the gallery section and will let those that have read this know.

It has been an interesting journey and would recommend to others to have ago and see what you come up with, it's not easy but I feel that its very rewarding and has given me the view of what its like being behind the lens with me taking the photos. I think that it will make a difference on how I will work with sitters or models for the future, not dramatically but a slight difference in my approach.

Thank you for taking the time to read this and hope that it's been informative. AndyD